Resilience - How's Your Bounce Back Game?
2020 is here. Happy New Year! Did anyone start setting intentions or have you set a New Year’s resolution? If you want to know the difference, scroll back to my Dec 2018 posts and find out why I don’t believe in resolutions and how intentions can help to create meaningful internal attachments allowing us to live our values out, loud and energetically.
Today, I want to talk about the word Resilience. Many of you in the business world are thinking about your goals for 2020. You may be reviewing 2019 performance with your teams or your own performance with the leaders in the organization. Even in your personal life, you might be goal setting related to your finances, your health or even your home. In discussing 2019 and reflecting on what I delivered -my accomplishments and my opportunities, the word resilient was used as a descriptor for me. I’ve been doing a lot of reflection on that word this week. I’m certain that there is a strong level of resiliency within me, but I’m curious how others can see that, and also what makes me resilient?
Resilience is defined by VeryWell Mind as is “the mental reservoir of strength that people are able to call on in times of need to carry them through without falling apart”. Psychology Today speaks to resilience as the “ineffable quality that allows some people to be knocked down by life and come back at least as strong as before. Rather than letting difficulties or failure overcome them and drain their resolve, they find a way to rise.”
If I start to unpack how others can see resiliency in me, I started to think about how I show up. Earlier last year, I co-created and delivered a learning module to thousands of HR professionals around the world. This was a great series and I was very proud of the work we did. When it came to presenting the content, I did not want to be afraid. I didn’t want my nervousness to come across because this material and topic was so important, I didn’t want my inner critic to sabotage me. My intention was to be poised, and deliver with confidence and excitement. That’s exactly what I did. Instead of fueling myself with negative self talk about myself, I fueled myself with confidence and therefore exuded it. What does this have to do with resilience? What I didn’t mention is that the content was developed by a very small team -of amazing colleagues- in a few short weeks. Over the holiday, when most are off celebrating, not only was I building out the content, but I was also launching a coaching business, traveling, and heavily focused on self care. At the time, it didn’t seem overwhelming, but when I think back, I realize this was a lot of work. How in the world did I do it?
Instead of focusing on the fact that I was new to the role, have never developed learning content, nor was I really certain if what we were driving was really aligned to the vision of the senior leaders.- I focused on the fact that I know what I know. I am a subject matter expert, and as an added bonus, I am a coach. I know how to help people look inward and help them to show up as their best selves. With this in mind, I drafted out content that would allow the audience to connect and engage in ways they never had. I utilized my network, built a small team, and had a viable product that needed some small tweaks when the larger team returned from vacation. When I momentarily allowed myself to metaphorically be knocked down for a hot minute while trying to comprehend what felt like a mammoth to-do, resilience was what allowed me to move quickly from victim to victor. Resilience to me, is the ability to move from problem to solution, expeditiously.
What makes me the way that I am? Being a victim sucks. The energy associated with it is draining, and to be quite honest, I don’t have time for that. I want to build. I want meaningful connections and I want to maximize my time here on this earth with things that feel good to my soul. A good girlfriend reminded me of something I say often. I want to be a light, and by that I mean -I want to reflect my values, my intentions in a way that lights me up and lights others up. When you allow your light to shine, as your authentic self, you never know the extent to which you can energetically uplift others.
If you asked your co- workers, friends or family how they would describe you when faced with a difficult situation - what would they say. Does that description line up with how you want to show up in the world?