Leaning Into Your Super Power?
Sometimes when I meet new people, as a conversation starter, I ask them “What’s your Super Power?” Then they look at me like I’m crazy, so I ask in a more civilized manner, What unique power do you have within you that allows you to be so successful? I’ve always thought my superpower was resilience, until it was recently tested.
Life has changed for most if not all of us. I live about an hour and a half away from the US pandemic center in NYC. Because of that, my resilience has been tested more that I could ever imagine. I’ve always been someone who is good at expressing how I feel, feeling the emotion, dealing with the emotion, and putting in the trash after I’m done. This has been a bit different.
Anxiety is a term people use to describe a feeling I knew nothing about. Sure I’ve been upset or nervous, about a thing, but never experienced anxiety until a month or so ago. I recall the exact moment, and what I was doing. I had experienced a significant loss in my life, and was dealing with my own emotions, and then Covid-19 started to hit closer and closer, and more loss came, I didn’t know how to protect myself, my family, my loved ones. I was fortunate enough to be able to work from home, but everywhere I looked, was devastation. Everyone I spoke to was emanating fear, and uncertainty. Of course it was a time if unknown. We’ve never seen anything like this, and because I had so much pain I was dealing with myself, I had no time to process and compartmentalize my feelings before I was feeling the weight of everyone’s trepidation.
There was a new feeling that was in my body. Anxiety was there, and it had me. It was warm. It was panic. It was breathless. Heart beating too fast. Am I going to die right now? I need air. I need water. I need it to stop. Go back to normal world, right now. I need you to stop spinning. Tell husband, call best friend. Breathe. Walk. Is it safe to go outside? No- its’s too scary out there. Phone rings, bad news, tears and pain. And that was the cycle. It lasted on and off for a few days. I did not have anxiety, but anxiety was with me. I stopped consuming the news. I limited my interactions with people. I occupied myself with work, with yoga, with meditation. I protected my energy, my space. Allowed myself to mourn, and then my anabolic energy started to return. I became more solution oriented instead of problem centered.
I realized that my superpower was still my superpower. I’m still resilient, and sometimes resilience doesn’t work on my time table or maybe my body and my mind needed time to be in the struggle, and feel the struggle before I emerged. I needed to rebuild my strength come out stronger and fiercer.
I encourage you all to lean into your superpower. This is a time of change like we’ve never seen. It’s also a time of rebirth, and love. I’ve seen so much love among neighbors, and friends. I see how much love and dedication our essential workers display. I see unity more than I see division. I want to be a light, a beacon of love and I’m here for you!
If you’re struggling with resilience, or your own superpower, and you’re ready to make some shifts, click below to schedule a free 30 min discovery call.